Uh oh, ‘24’ is back to its old (stupid) tricks (TV commentary)

Chloe is put in charge of CTU; Renee and Jack have sex less than an hour after Jack found President Hassan dead; Hassan’s widow agrees to take over as IRK president; the Russians pull out of the peace talks, blatantly suggesting that they have hidden motives; President Taylor goes to criminal ex-President Charles Logan for help; and the secretary of state who had a heart attack two hours ago is back at work.

Yup, just another hour in the story of “24” (8 p.m. Central Mondays on Fox).

I admit that I plan to watch “24” until the end of this, its final season. And it built up so much momentum early in the season that I might actually enjoy some things about the rest of the season. But my gosh, this show is getting really stupid, really fast.

The weird thing about “24” is that although it pioneered the “real time” concept, it never wanted to take place in real time. Not really. As early as Season 2, it had exploded all credibility of taking place in real time. Now, in Season 8, that’s the elephant in the writers’ room: The events on “24” can’t possibly be happening in real time, and honestly, there’s no reason to have the real time conceit in the first place.

It’s actually good that “24” the TV show is ending so we can have “24” (or maybe they should just call it “Jack Bauer” now) movies instead. Presumably those will abandon this “real time” nonsense.

As the plot goes, the government of the U.S. is in a crisis right now. The peace talks are in danger of blowing up, terrorists who almost murdered everyone in Manhattan have just been apprehended (but who’s to say there aren’t more terrorists out there?) along with their nuclear rods (but who’s to say there aren’t more rods out there?), and the government picks this moment to kick out CTU Director Hastings (because he hired the annual “mole inside CTU,” something that absolutely no one is blaming him for). Even if firing Hastings is a political necessity, why the rush?

What’s more, the higher-ups install the decidedly unproven Chloe in his place. It will lead to entertaining scenes, I’m sure, and actually I think Chloe will take to the leadership role surprisingly well. However, making a change at this point in the game is dumb and dangerous.

Look, I know Renee and Jack have had smoldering feelings for each other all day, but it’s incredibly out of character for them to be going at it less than an hour after Jack found Hassan’s corpse. It doesn’t seem like natural human behavior, let alone natural Jack-and-Renee behavior.

As revealed in this episode, the Russians are the bad guys of the piece. So why would they pull out of the peace talks without a good excuse? Wouldn’t it make more sense to go along with the peace talks so the other countries don’t suspect anything? That Russian ambassador couldn’t have acted more suspicious if he had taken a theater class on how to act suspicious.

President Taylor’s solution to this all-of-a-sudden Russian problem is to accept help from the slimy ex-President Logan (who, if you’ll recall, arranged to have President Palmer killed a few seasons ago). Just as the Russian ambassador couldn’t be more suspicious, Logan couldn’t be slimier. He shouldn’t even be on Taylor’s radar of people who she can trust. Not remotely. One question (among many) Taylor should ask is: How did Logan know about this Russian problem so quickly?

Secretary of State Kanin, who had a heart attack two hours ago, is perfectly fine. He’s in a wheelchair, but he looks ready to jump out of it and punch the doctor if he tells him one more time to take it easy. Is this that world-class health care that government officials get?

Oh, and Hassan’s widow agrees to become the new IRK president less than an hour after her husband’s murder. Look, I know the peace talks have a sense of urgency to them, but couldn’t they let Hassan’s body cool first? Still, this is the most believable part of the episode by far.

I’ve always wished I was better at relaxing. Watching “24” isn’t helping me reach that goal. But compared to what the characters on “24” do in one day — heck, in one hour — the most chemically imbalanced go-getter on the face of the planet is the epitome of laziness.

This show is utterly ridiculous. I don’t mean that as “This show is utterly ridiculous, and I’m loving every minute of it!” I mean: This show is utterly ridiculous, and it makes me kind of sad.

Do you agree that this once-strong season of “24” has taken a turn for the worse, or am I overreacting? Share your thoughts in the comment thread.